The Mission Statement.

Ok, here it goes. Ever get angry for no reason? Ever want to throw things at your TV, kick something or just plain get so impotently hacked off that you want to slam your head repeatedly in a door? Or photo-copy your private parts and post them to all those people that send you junk mail? Or set fire to a cat? You do? Ok, someone needs to chill out.............................

Well, I have gotten to the point that my wife will no longer allow me to watch the serious news, due to sudden and expletive ridden rants at the poxy, melodramatic, sensationalist BOLLOCKS that the news readers spout. Is it a bit cold this winter? Nooooo, that's not going to scare the pants off of anyone. No, it's THE COLDEST WINTER SINCE RECORDS BEGAN! It's WINTER-GEDDON! It's FROSTY THE SNOWMAN COME TO RAPE YOUR GRANDMOTHER TO DEATH! And of course the weather isn't a NATURAL phenomenon, it's THE GOVERNMENTS FAULT.!

Relax Al, breath. This blog is the avenue for my frustrations at a world full of stupid things, places and people and the way they make those of us with a brain want to pull it out through our noses with a spoon. I will try and keep my posts topical, informative and angry, not that I expect any particular difficulty with the latter and will include my (over)reactions to the news, music releases, films, car reviews and current affairs, plus anything else that pops into my mind and hacks me off.

The Vampiric Chicken is a 25 year old father of one (so far) from Cornwall in the UK in SERIOUS need of an attitude adjustment, a good nights sleep and probably some form of sedative.

Hope you enjoy the ride...........................